Forgiveness

Forgiveness is something that pulls not only your mistake in life but also the entire events in the life of your ancestors that happened in the long past. First you need to find a reason why you cannot forgive an act or situation. Recently, I experienced a profound change in my thinking. It all started with thinking about the truth of who I am and who my traditions are, so I started digging into the history of my ancestors. I started from my grandfather whom I never met. He died violently under violent circumstances and his last words were so profound that I realized that this was the reason for my suffering. Namely, his concern for the children in his last thoughts shook me so much that it caused a tremendous rush of emotions and tears. At that moment, I didn't know why I was crying so much, so I was sad for a long time that day. In the meantime, it happened that I was talking to a dear person and I realized that I still don't have the strength or confidence that I needed. I was so burdened by it that I couldn't resist strong emotions of anxiety, questions, and searching for answers. I realized that I had to meditate, to calm down and let go of all the negativity, pride, pain and misery that I felt at that moment. I went to bed and began to pray to God all the time. I prayed so fervently until I began to feel peace in my soul. Then I fell into a deep sleep. And instead of a feeling of relief, I had a terrible nightmare. I was looking for reasons in others for my depression, when in fact that depression was coming from the depths of my soul, which I was not even aware of. As soon as I woke up, I started to think in all possible directions what was the reason for such a difficult situation in which I was. I called my mom, who wasn't available for some reason, and then decided to talk to her friend, with whom I get along very well and who is very dear to me. A sincere, honest soul, full of love and understanding listened to my presentation and stated that my difficulty lies not in other people but in myself. I suddenly understood. It was as if a veil of fog had cleared from my head and only one thought occurred to me at that moment. Yeah, that's it. The same words my grandfather spoke before his death that deeply touched my soul were the answer to my centuries of suffering. The truth is that his last words were in fact a strong echo in my soul when, after so many decades, I discovered what was decades away and so important to know. That was my revelation and then I understood why I had suffered for years. This feeling of pain, sadness, emptiness, dissatisfaction, sadness and powerlessness to fight with it is indescribable and leaves deep traces on the course of our entire life and until it is discovered it is not possible to be free, happy, kind, and remain positive. I will not talk about the details, but I want to tell you that if you have such situations in your life, please dig deep into your past and find the reasons for your mistrust, sadness, and the prohibition of access to your heart. Believe me, that burden drags you into the abyss and until you release it, you cannot know all the wonders of this wonderful life. With love, Antica. Write a nice instructive story from this context so that everyone can find themselves in it.

The Author, Antica Zovko

Oprost!

Oprost je nesto sto vuce ne samo vasu pogresku u zivotu nego i cijeli dogadji u zivotu vasih predaka koji su se desili u davnoj proslosti. Prvo treba da nadjete razlog zbog kojeg nemozete da oprostite neko djelo ili situaciju. Meni se nedavno desio dubok preokret u mom razmisljanju. Sve

je pocelo razmisljanjem o istini ko sam ja i ko su moji predaci pa sam tako krenula da cackam po istoriji svojih predaka. Krenula sam od svog djeda kojeg nikad nisam upoznala. Umro je nasilno pod nasilnim okolnostima i njegove posljednje rijeci su bile toliko duboke da sam shvatila da je to razlog mojih patnji. Naime, njegova briga za djecu u posljednim mislima je mene toliko uzdrmala da je izazvala strahovit nagon emocija i placa. U tom momentu nisam znala zasto toliko placem, pa sam bila dugo tuzna taj dan. U medjuvremenu se desilo to da sam razgovarala sa jednom osobom dragom osobom i shvatila kako i dalje nemam snage ni povjerenja koje mi je i te kako bilo potrebno. Toliko sam bila opterecena tim da nisam mogla da odolim snaznim emocijama tjeskobe, pitanja, i trazenja odgovora. Shvatila sam da moram da meditiram, da se smirim i otpustim svu negativnost, gordost, bol i jad koji sam u tom trenutku osjecala. Otisla sam leci i pocela da se molim bogu svesredno. Tako sam zustro molila dok nisam pocela da osjecam mir u svojoj dusi. Onda sam duboko zaspala. I umjesto osjecaja olaksanja imala sam tesku nocnu moru. Trazila sam razloge u drugima za svoju moru kad je u stvari ta mora dolazila iz dubine moje duse a koje ja nisam bila ni svjesna. Cim sam se probudila pocela sam da razmisljam u svim mogucim pravcima sta je razlog tako teskom stanju u kojem sam se nalazila. Nazvala sam mamu koja nije bila dostupna iz nekog razloga i onda odlucila da pricam sa njenom prijateljicom s kojom se jako lijepo slazem i koja mi je vrlo draga. Jedna iskrena, postena dusa, puna ljubavi i razumijevanja saslusala je moje izlaganje i konstatovala da moja poteskoca ne lezi u drugim ljudima nego meni samoj. Odjednom sam shvatila. Kao da se veo magle razbistrio iz moje glave i samo jednam misao mi je sinula u tom trenutku. Da, pa to je to. Iste one rijeci koje je moj deda izgovorio prije smrti koje su duboko dirnule moju dusu su bile odgovor na moje vjekovne patnje. Istina kako su njegove posljednje rijeci u stvari bile snazni odjek u mojoj dusi kad sam nakon toliko decenija otkrila sta je bilo decenijama daleko a tako bitno da se sazna. To je bilo moje otkrivenje i tad sam shvatila zasto sam godinama patila. Taj osjecaj boli, tuge, praznine, nezadovoljstva, tuge i nemocnosti da se s njom bori je neopisiva i ostavlja duboke tragove na tok naseg cijelog zivota i sve dok se to ne otkrije nije moguce biti slobodan, sretan, mio, i ostati pozitivan. Necu pricati o detaljima ali zelim da vam porucim ako imate takve situacije u svom zivotu molim vas od srca zagrnite duboko u svoju proslost i nadjite razloge svog nepovjerenja, tuge, i zabrane pristupa vasem srcu. Vjerujte taj teret vas vuce u ponor i dok ga god ne otpustite nemozete spoznati sve cari ovog predivnog zivota.

Autorica, Antica Zovko.